Wednesday, December 24, 2008

pandora

for the first time i'm really sick this year& i'm doing everything in my power to get better after i go back to work tomorrow& get off work so nathan can talk me to nashville for a delightful christmas eve dinner. yet right now now, i'm all out of sorts& i'm kind of starting to feel better but man, you should have seen me at work two days ago. it was the second time i had to leave early sick but this time i threw up in the bathroom. i cam back out& one of my co-workers noticed& said something. i kind of started crying because having cramps& throwing up are not the most wonderful combination.

i felt terrible for leaving my assit. manager& temp associate on a busy shopping day& i mean so busy i show people i hadn't seen in years. which made it even worse because i looked like CRAP. my face was red, my face was soft& low because of the congestion& i couldn't hear out my ears. for one the music was too loud& i kept turning it down but it always found it's way with other figures to turn it's self back up.

my other assit. manager that was working that night called my boss to give the go ahead for me to leave. i was going to be so pissed if i didn't leave. here you have a girl working who is a) throwing up b) slightly coughing c) snot coming from nostrils &&& d) sore throat. after i got off work, i went to food lion on the way home to get some drugs. really nice drugs by the way. as i was standing in line, a lady they call Mama Judy show me huddled& clinging tightly to my drugs& said she could take the next person in line. i was last& had a clear shot to her line.

i saw you looking so ill honey& had to get you home quick.

i could have hugged the woman, now i know way they call her mama.

i came home, made some hot tea, blew my nose till it slightly hurt, to some rather nice pm bills, followed by NyQuil cold& flu& sucked on cough drops while watching Becoming Jane till i fall asleep.

i then woke up at 10& repeated it, over a period of hours of course. yet, i am now fully awake because my head has slept peacefully for hours. i haven't seen the sun or the outside. i didn't even want to look outside because it would just piss me off. i took some pain pills that mom gave me to make my cramps feel at ease& with all the combination of medication i've been on cloud nine.

anyway, that's what i've been up to!

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I never question what to do, it tells me what to do. The photographs make themselves with my help. ~Ruth Bernhard
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